If you look up mommy guilt on the internet there is a lot of information. Feeling guilty as a mom is common. We all want to feel like we are doing a good job and that we are accomplishing this all important job of parenting. For this post though I want to go beyond some of the surface areas to look at the deeper issues below. When we parent from a wounded place we set a pattern of parenting from guilt that hurts our authority as a parent and adversely affects our child in the long run. So let’s ditch the mom guilt and discover 5 ways to break free of parenting from guilt. [Read more…]
Much of America is currently trying to survive overwhelming natural disasters. Two category 4 hurricanes have hit land causing incomprehensible damage and as I’m writing this our country is remembering the attacks of September 11th. How do you think like a survivor? What is the difference between people who seem to fade away under the crush of overwhelming circumstances and those that seem to only grow stronger? This question that has always intrigued me. How do we resolve to think like a survivor? [Read more…]
“Mom, why are you taking a picture of your arm?”, my daughter asked. I was sitting on the couch capturing a photo of the huge bruise on my arm. My arm was black and blue from an unexpected surgery I had gone through the week before. ” It will help me as I recover emotionally to remember that I have gone through this surgery,” I tried to explain. I knew, that soon the bruises would fade, but the emotional pain and heartache I (and my family) had gone through would last much longer. [Read more…]
Earlier this week I shared Coping When Kids Leave Home Part I. Today, I would like to share the second part of that post, Coping When Kids Leave Home Part II. As I mentioned, it is more than just seeing your kids less. It is a new season. It is a reason to celebrate. You and your child made it through the growing up years. They are ready to leave the nest and start a new season in their life. However, as a parent it is challenging to see our kids move forward without us. How do we let go of one season in our relationship with our child in order to allow a new one to bloom? [Read more…]
Fall is fast approaching. Fall is a season when many parents say good-bye to their college age children. Last year, my Country Boy and I said good-bye to our second son as he moved out for college. I knew it was coming, but man oh man it didn’t make it any easier. Here are a few things I learned in the process of coping when kids leave home. I hope that you are comforted by the realization that you are not alone as a parent, as you go through this stage. Whether your child is leaving to join the military, moving to start life on their own or to college, it is a new season. [Read more…]
Summer is almost here in the Midwest! My husband and children planted flowers, mulched and mowed Sunday making the yard around our farmhouse lovely. Now the view out my kitchen window is even more calming and beautiful. It made me think about those things in our lives that rejuvenate and allow us to relax and refuel. I thought it would be fun to put together a list of 9 soothing gifts for a stressed or weary friend.
I am blessed to have many wonderful gift givers in my life. When I feel stressed due to some big adventure we are in the middle of or weary due to needing to recover physically, inevitably a gift shows up. I love gifts! Love to give them and receive them. I especially enjoy sending a gift in the mail anticipating a friends receiving it! So what are some great soothing gifts for a stressed or weary friend. What gift will encourage your friend to take a breathe, find a minute for themselves, or gain some calming perspective? [Read more…]
I wanted to send you a letter of encouragement, as I was thinking about you today. Life is really hard for you right now, but I don’t want you to lose hope. My sweet friend, as you read my letter of encouragement may you feel strengthened and comforted.
My years as a single mom were so hard. I remember each day being a struggle. Some days I just tried to make it to bedtime. As we talked last week, I could hear in your voice that same struggle. But don’t give up. You are going to make it through this troubling time you are in right now. And there are so many wonderful days ahead for you! Please believe that!
I am so proud of you!
I want you to know how proud I am of you! You have continued to take care of yourself and your obligations even as you are struggling. You have not given up or just laid down hoping someone else will rescue you. [Read more…]
Note: This post contains affiliate links. Read more about it here. The woman sitting across from me was living in crisis mode. Fifteen years ago, I was just starting out as a court and family advocate. Part of the job I loved was talking with the clients that came into our agency. After hearing the woman in my office speak for close to half an hour, I was greatly concerned. She was in a very vulnerable position. Her current relationship was abusive. And to make matters worse she seemed trapped in crisis mode.
She had come into our non-profit agency seeking support and advocacy. Her voice rising and becoming more urgent as she talked about the crisis she was facing. After listening to her tell me everything that was occurring in her life, I suggested a small action step or two that she could take.
She paused appearing to listen.
And then the moment I stopped talking she picked right up where she had left off almost as if I had never said anything.
I had experienced this before. She was trapped in crisis mode. [Read more…]
When I first saw the book, A Mother’s Reckoning: Living in the Aftermath of Tragedy by Sue Klebold, I was both eager to read and dreading it at the same time. Sue Klebold is the mother of Dylan Klebold, one of the teenagers who entered Columbine High School and killed 13 students and faculty. To read the very words of one whose life and name had become synonymous with the Columbine High School shooting massacre of 1999, felt overwhelming and too dark.
However, I truly appreciate a book showing the human spirit’s ability to rise above tragedy. And one of my librarians gave me her compelling review, so I decided to take the plunge and read the book. [Read more…]