Before I met my man I knew nothing about hunting. OK, I knew a few things. You know the Bugs Bunny episodes when Elmer Fudd “hunts” the rabbit? That was the extent of my knowledge. Hunters talk to themselves and wear black and red jackets! So I had a few things to learn. Since you, my lovely readers, have been digging deep the past few weeks, examining your priorities and looking for ways to strengthen your families, I thought we should have some fun on this post! So I’m sharing all my wisdom and experience here to create a bride’s guide to marrying a country boy! Feel free to share…just don’t judge me!! 🙂
A Bride’s Guide to Marrying a Country Boy
Our oldest is getting married this month so I have marriage on the brain. I think his bride will be much better prepared than I was. So before you marry a country boy you should know a few things to be prepared to love your hard-working man.
Know the Difference between a Tree Stand and a Christmas Tree Stand
We were sitting in a Steak and Shake sharing dessert on our first date and Country Boy kept talking about all his tree stands. I was a little taken aback having trouble visualizing this big tough guy decorating all his trees for Christmas. But I allowed my mind to wander and thought what a great idea it would be to have several Christmas trees lighting up the house.
Fortunately, for once in my life, I kept my mouth closed and did NOT share this pleasant image. Come to find out that a “tree stand” to a country boy is something you set up in a tree and hunt out of it!! No cute Christmas ornaments in sight! And for some unforseen reason one needs multiple tree stands because one is never enough.
So brides, you need to be prepared to have multiple tree stands taking up space in your garage or basement!
Don’t Worry about Feeding the Bush Hog
Now on a farm there are often lots of animals you have to feed. A bush hog is NOT one of them. Though it may sound like an animal a bush hog is actually a piece of equipment that mows down big pastures.. Now, I actually did know this. Though if you ask Country Boy he will swear that I didn’t, but thanks to my Tennessee relatives I had seen one of these in action. I just had to tease him before we were married by asking him how much they ate. The look on his face was priceless. I think he almost thought of taking me back to the city and dropping me off!
Mark Your Tupperware as Off Limits
We were still in our first year or so of marriage, when I opened the refrigerator one day and screamed. There was one of my nice Tupperware bowls and something or rather somebody was floating in it! Country Boy had taken the boys out hunting earlier that day. They had all trudged home looking pretty pleased with themselves. Little did I know that the “trophy” was going to be cleaned and put into one of MY Tupperware bowls.
I was barely getting used to the idea of cooking with venison (deer) meat when suddenly I was faced with a request for “rabbit stew”. I declined! Though I was starting to appreciate venison for the relative cheap and very healthy meat it was I decided to draw the line on rabbit stew AND on my Tupperware bowls!
Check the Volume on the Television
If your country boy is into hunting, please PLEASE check the volume before you turn on the TV. On hunting shows they all whisper because despite the portrayed images of hunters just strolling loudly through the woods while supposedly hunting that is not how it works. One has to be very quiet as animals are clever and totally aware of anything off in their surroundings.
So on the hunting shows everyone whispers. And of course you have to crank up the volume on the television to hear. And then the unsuspecting bride comes in the room later and flips on the TV and about loses an eardrum because it is soooo loud! Ugh, I fell for this one several times before I learned.
Have Dinner Ready Sometime between 5pm – 8:30pm
I told my Country Boy the other evening at dinner time that I need to teach a class on how to have dinner ready sometime in a 3 hour span. He replies with a comment about how we typically eat at the same time every evening. I asked him what time would that be and then gave him a deadpan look when he mentioned a time, looking pointedly at the clock. I state my case!
When you are married to a country boy chances are that his “work” is not going to fit into a set schedule. He may even have a regular job but after his day job he jumps into more work. When its planting or harvesting season the days get longer. And then there is hunting and fishing season, which I suggest just keeping a pot of soup on the stove. And calving season. Or there are times when they may be building a barn, pond or a house.
Thankfully, when all the kids were younger, we tried to keep things slightly more consistent. A girl has to have some boundaries, right?
Be Prepared to Drive a Variety of Vehicles
Within the first few months of meeting, I became aware of the wide variety of vehicles Country Boy could drive. Little did I know that I would one day have my own dump truck too…and that was probably a good thing I didn’t.
Early in our courting days, I visited him while he was farming a friend’s fields. He jumped out of a big combine and then over to a semi truck. I finally asked him if there was any vehicle he couldn’t drive.
Later on when we built a house we purchased a grain truck and later a dump truck. When you build a home or remodel a home you pay a lot of money for gravel delivery and garbage removal. So Country Boy reasoned why keep paying for delivery when we can drive the truck ourselves. Hence acquiring my very own dump truck!!
Now ya’ll I don’t mind driving a truck to Lowe’s or Home Depot, but the local dump or gravel yard is quite intimidating. Especially when your husband gives you a head’s up that the guy at the dump yard will probably yell at you but don’t back the truck up as far as he says to or you will get stuck. What!? Are you kidding me? I have to drive a dump truck, go to the dump yard AND get yelled at? Well, sign me up!
Thankfully, if their schedule allowed my Country Boy, father or father-in-law drove the truck. But, I did have my baptism by dump truck experiences. About shocked the city girl right out of me! But, hey we city girls are tough too so I survived.
What About You? Could you have used A Bride’s Guide to Marrying a Country Boy when you were first married?
Life with Country Boy has never been dull. I am thankful that even as we have struggled at times to relate we are able to laugh about our misadventures. Marriage is a lot of work. But when you are able to laugh together and to see your spouse for the amazingly gifted person they are it makes it worth it.
So did you and your spouse have some funny misunderstandings when you were first married? I would love to hear about them, so comment below!
You also might enjoy my Signs You Live in the Country post here.
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