Marriage is hard. Parenting is challenging. So in celebration of all our hard work lately let’s have a little fun with this post, because we all need to be able to step back and enjoy the hilarity of life! Country Boy and I are blessed to have families with very similar values. But when it comes to where we grew up, life was very different. It is definitely a case of city girl meets a country boy! So here are some signs you married a country boy that I have learned.
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Signs You Married a Country Boy
All marriages have that startling moment when you think, “I’ve married someone from another planet.” When you first get married you may marvel at all the similarities you have. You feel so proud of yourself for finding a person who you see eye to eye with on almost everything. And then reality hits!
So what do you do? Sometimes I handled Country Boy and my’s differences with grace or laughter. Other times I may have actually screamed like a girl!
Help, There is Something Dead in My Trunk!
We had been married less than a year and I borrowed my husband’s car to go to the grocery store. When I came back out of the store, I popped the trunk to put the groceries away. There was a black garbage bag half full of something in the middle. No problem, I thought, I’ll just push the stuff out-of-the-way. But when I went to push the garbage bag toward the back, It hardly budged! It was so heavy…like a body kind of heavy. I tried to shove harder, but the bag still wasn’t moving.
I cautiously opened the trash bag and then let out a scream at what I saw and felt. There was hair. Soft hair! Well, I about came unglued.
I’ve married an ax murderer, I thought! I knew that man was too good to be true!
Gaining my composure back I looked more carefully. Much to my relief I realized the hair was actually deer pelts.
Upon questioning my husband later, I learned that he was transporting deer pelts for a buddy who processed deer to a friend who then used the hides.
Thankfully, there was no actual body in the trunk, but I was still much more hesitant about borrowing Country Boy’s car.
The Laundry Adventure!
One of the signs you married a country boy is that laundry is an adventure. For one, there is A LOT of dirt. And it does not always smell good! Actually I’m not sure it really is all dirt….but I try not to think about that. I often have to rinse clothes before I can wash them. Other times, the clothes just go to the trash. Like when there are giant holes in brand new jeans!
“Where did this hole come from,” I grilled Country Boy? “I caught on fire at work today,” he casually mentions. Of course you did.
And you better check the pockets. I find screws, nails, sharpies along with the typical receipts and trash.
Recently, I was doing laundry when my daughter came walking into the mud room.
“Hey, do you know what these are,” I asked her holding out my hand with a colored small rubber band looking thing. “Oh, that’s for the baby bulls, ” Little Red said. “When you want to turn a new bull into a steer you just put those on his private…” At this point I had dropped said “rubber bands” like they were on fire.
“Mom, those haven’t been used.” Little Red said laughing. Hmmm…..
Thankfully, when we moved into our most recent home I was able to pick out a brand new washer and dryer set from LG! I highly recommend their top loaders. I can fit everything I want into the washer, and it has so many settings. Cleans even the dirtiest of clothes! A city girl’s dream for taking care of the less than charming side of country living!
Don’t Mess with the Fried Chicken
Country Boy was blessed to marry a pretty good cook, when he married me;). However, there were several meals that I had not mastered that I tried to learn because they seemed pretty important to him. One such meal was fried chicken. My first several attempts to make fried chicken were less than wonderful. But I felt like I was making progress.
However, I wasn’t sure I was truly getting the appreciation I felt I deserved! So one evening I decided I would try to trick Country Boy by passing off Kentucky Fried Chicken’s special recipe chicken as my own! I figured my husband didn’t really know his chicken as much as he acted like he did.
So I brought home the chicken, hid the box and served Country Boy his “homemade fried chicken” along with several actual home cooked sides. And then I sat smugly down at the table.
Country Boy took one bite, looked at me and said, “Great KFC, Honey.” Arrgghhh!
Wall Space is Premium Real Estate
Truly, I wished someone had warned me about making sure I claimed as much wall space as possible before my country boy did. When we married he had maybe 2 deer heads on display in his living room wall.
Now, my Mom always said you can’t marry someone, and then try to change everything about them. So I figured the deer heads were part of the package deal when we married. However, what I didn’t plan on was that the heads would multiply!!
Country Boy is a bowhunter. And a very fine one, I might add. It takes a lot of skill, time and effort to hunt and score a buck with a bow. And especially to get a Pope and Young record book worthy deer that you would want to pay the extra money to mount on the wall. So I figured there was no way I was going to have to worry about many more deer mounts. Boy, was I wrong!!
My breaking point was number 6! I felt like that was way more than any one room…or one house, for that matter, truly needed. I mean after all what if my friends from my all girl high school ever saw the inside of my house!
So I did what any reasonable girl does when she needs help. I called my Dad!
My Dad built me a nice, very tall, bookshelf to take up the one wall that didn’t have any deer heads on it in my living room. And I put the bookshelf right in the middle of the wall:)!
Married to a hunter or fisherman? Country Boy loved these short stories from Steve Chapman, A Look at Life from a Deer Stand: Hunting for the Meaning of Life. Perfect for a birthday or Father’s Day gift!
Grace is Greater
Like I mentioned earlier, every marriage has those tipping points when you begin to wonder if you married someone from this planet. One key ingredient to a happier marriage for me has been grace. If we wait for things in a marriage to be fair or equal, we may be waiting awhile.
But if we think of marriage as an opportunity for us to grow and show the other person grace for their bad moments (or the silly differences we just don’t understand:), life typically runs much smoother.
Because then we don’t have to wait for our spouse to be perfect before we can show love. And thankfully, we are shown love too, even when we are less than wonderful!
We just finished reading a book called Grace is Greater by Kyle Idleman in our small group at church. The book was very enjoyable to read as it was quick-moving and full of great stories to represent his points. But Grace is Greater was also very impactful. The book reminded me of how much we all need to be able to forgive ourselves of mistakes we have made. Sometimes giving ourselves grace can be the hardest! Any one else struggle with living in “what if” land occasionally?
Our relationships desperately need grace too. Though it can be hard to forgive when someone hurts us, it is more exhausting and detrimental to our health to hang onto all that pain and hurt.
Grace is Greater by Kyle Idleman is full of powerful illustrations of grace. I would highly recommend the book, especially if you feel like you have become emotionally “stuck” due to a past hurt or betrayal. As Kyle Idleman points out, even if we have unforgiveness toward someone we are not currently around, it may be affecting our current relationships!
Signs You Married a Country Boy
I hope you enjoyed this more light-hearted post! So now tell me…what is the biggest difference in your marriage that you have had to circumnavigate? Where you grew up, financial, religion, cultural, age…?
Enjoyed this post? You may also like A Bride’s Guide to Marrying a Country Boy or A Secret to a Happier Marriage
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Kirsten @obtainingbliss.com says
OH, I love this and I can so relate. Although, my husband isn’t technically a “country boy” he is an avid hunter and fisher, so I can relate to the dead things being hung on the wall. We’ve had many an argument over it. I’m also more open-minded and my hubby is the mild-mannered one.
Miranda says
Kirsten,
I’m glad you can relate! Yep, we have had plenty of “discussions” about what hangs on the wall:)!
Heather Bee says
Oh my goodness! The deer pelts in the trunk… I can’t even imagine! And Matt sure must know his fried chicken; I think I might be able to get away with that one! Thanks for the laugh today; I hadn’t heard those stories and they were fun.
Miranda says
Heather,
So glad you enjoyed it!! Yay, happy to know I came up with some new stories you hadn’t heard yet:)
Kim says
One big difference was that my husband came from an “I love you” family. They all told each other they loved each other all the time! Now my family is an “I love you” family too! What a lovely change.
Miranda says
Awww…I love that (no pun intended:)! It is great the new things we can learn from our spouse.
misty says
Oh Miranda! We all have our early lessons on marriage and reconciling differences, but your stories had me laughing and, frankly, not feeling like I have it so rough! 🙂 I know you have figured out these surprises with grace and equality. Thanks for reminding us that we can love each other’s quirks as well as find peace and middle-ground even when our husbands see differently than us!
Miranda says
Misty,
I’m so glad you enjoyed the post. It is good to reflect on all the things we love about our spouse and to focus on “find(ing) peace and middle-ground” as you so eloquently put:)
Misty | Simple organized lifestyle says
No, you can only do fried chicken a certain way, agree, ha! Love the ways you’ve found to laugh & extend grace. A big difference in our marriage is our food preferences- he’s picky and I’m not. That still takes some work and planning, but he’s tried a few new things and I’ve learned how to master a grilled cheese:]